Spoliarium

These are the tips on how to Live a Surreal Life. Created and Compiled by the Imperial Concordium

Allen dela Fuente

1. Randomly inject sexual words into your conversations, preferably between bouts of laughter. Example: “Hahahaha - PENIS! - hahahaha” (At this point, the others will probably be quietly staring at you.)
2. Tell random pretty girls that they’re pretty and you’ve always loved them!
3. Wear a red shirt on red shirt days (Rally Days), then give the rallyists weird looks when they cheer for you because they think you’re one of them!
4. When painting graffiti, use unexpected images. Like Jesus in Quezon Ave, Or Elmo on the Church of the Gesu.

Gab Madrid

1. Break into either church or children’s song whilst in the midst of a group of silent strangers.
2. Do Allen’s #2, and when they ask “Really?” answer them “No.” with a blank, straight face a la Dr. House.

Martin Cusi

1. When in an argument, and someone says statement X, decline and state the Filipino translation of X [or if initial statement X is Filipino,  decline and state the English translation of X] Example: “Uy, umuulan.” “No dude, it’s just raining.”
2. When in an argument, and someone says word X, reply with “but X is just a word with Y letters” where Y is the number of letters in word X. Example: “But it’s food!” “But food is just a word with 4 letters!”
3.  When in an argument, and someone says word X, reply with “but X is just Y spelled backwards” where Y is word X spelled backwards. Example: “But it’s food!” “But food is just Doof spelled backwards!”